i bought shoes today....ha. shoes just help. i never realized that. they make feet happy. and comfortable. and they look pretty. I had a really good talk with nanny tonight. I think we both needed to go out and just walk around and talk. good times. baskin robbins turtle coffee shake things also generally make things better. phone with the Devine. Angela is pretty much the hottest sweater i've ever met. It's been a positive experience reconnecting with people who i basically put on the back burner last year. I have to do me. "Sometimes these things make you really cling to your art and things you love and give you an extra passion." - Colin. I mean thats my silver lining. and its true. Perspective put in place. I've never worked like this before, i've never sung like this before. i'ts flowing, but when i'm not busy, it hurts. keep busy. keep working, keep singing, keep laughing, keep living. drugged? will my passion cease? All of this emoting. overwhelming, wasted, unwanted, overused, powerful, useful. I don't have time. choices. fuck.